CHICAGO – The current M2s serving as clinic coordinators at the Devon Clinic have announced their replacement for the coming year would be the shorter of the two water fountains outside the men’s restrooms on the second floor of Galter Library.

Many students in the M1 class were surprised by the choice. But a current Devon Clinic coordinator who wished to remain anonymous explained the logic behind the decision.

“We actually had a decent number of applicants from the M1 class,” the coordinator said. “But none of the M1s seemed like they’d be able to make the time commitment that being a coordinator requires. The water fountain really just seemed like our best choice.”

The coordinator added, “Seriously though, what are you guys doing in class from 8:00 to 5:30? One applicant said they couldn’t dedicate more than 30 minutes per month to being a coordinator because of their paper snowflake homework. I wasn’t sure how seriously to take that excuse.”

The water fountain was not available for comment.