Chicago Bears Excited to Implement “Actual NFL Offense”
This article was written in response to a lost bet to Allison “I’m from Minnesota, but I’m a Packers fan and have two last names” Ducharme-Smith. HALAS HALL – Chicago…
Gunner Hopes World Doesn’t End Until AFTER First CV Exam
PRE-APOCALYPTIC EARTH – As the 5125 year long Mesoamerican Long Count calendar comes to on end on December 21, 2012, many are preparing for a cataclysmic event. It has been…
Turns Out Interviewee Just “Making Stuff Up” During Panel Interview
WARD – “No, no, no, that was after I killed Osama bin Laden,” Geoffrey Smart revealed during his closed file panel interview last week. The Yale graduate explained that he…
Flipside News Network Projects Unanimous Obama Victory
DISCLAIMER: This projection and study was funded by MSNBC, CNN, NPR, the Democratic Party, Boystown, women, pretty much every academic institution, and most developed countries.
Office of Admissions to Take Year Off, Cite Not Wanting to Hear Future Students Complain About New Curriculum
WARD – The Class of 2016 was Feinberg’s most talented and diverse class yet and it appears it will stay that way for at least another year. A spokesperson for…